Out to Sea Reflections of a January Day

I've been away for awhile.  Let's just say that January has not been a month at the beach for me.  It did end at the beach and for that I'm grateful.  Isn't amazing that in a blink of an eye, an entire month has passed.  Gone. In an instant.   Like most people, I enjoy reflecting on the year  early on in the month, and for the most part I did do that, just didn't really put my thoughts into words.  I missed my window of opportunity before the chaos of the month commenced for me early on.  I have thought about lots of things that I want to do in 2011.

Lots of things I want to differently so that moments don't rush out to sea or at least as quickly, before I have a chance to catch my breath and run  after them.

I really want to take a closer look and pay attention to the little details. The details like this that would be easy to miss if you walked to quickly by without taking notice of how wonderfully weathered and textured this object is.    Maybe more photography is in store for me, that would be one way that I could force myself to slow down and soak the world around me in.  In fact, I know it will be. I just bought myself a present for my 'art biz'...a Canon Rebel--and I love it.  Today was the first day I had an opportunity to take it out and play around with it since I bought it a month ago.  A MONTH ago??!!  Normally it would have been the type of gift that I would have rushed right and used it before it barely was unwrapped from the box.

I waited though until I had a day where I could just stop and breathe without rushing from one thing to another. Rush rush rush rush. I'm falling into a trap again. One that I said I would never do after I left retail. I'm choosing work over home and family life again...a lot.  Even my own health, I'm opting to let forgo until there is a 'better time' to take care of things I need to take care of. How did I let things get out of control?  How come I'm choosing one thing over another?  It's no one's fault but my own, truly. I could do things differently but I haven't. Or I couldn't, or perhaps I didn't see another way to do what I've had to do. Some of it's because I'm trying to establish myself as an artist while working full time and then some and take care of my son and the house...it's a lot but not impossible.  I just need to make better choices with my time and energy.  

I think you see things more clearly when you step back and look from a distance and then back around again looking closely if that makes sense.  Be objective and then analyze it all...then make a decision on how to change it all up. I need life to be a little less chaotic. I want to focus on things that make a difference. Not just making a difference for today and then gone again.

 I want to take more early morning walks.

 I want to breathe again and take time to be thankful for the smallest of things that make our world a better place.

I want to pursue things that make me want to wake up in the morning and smile...before it's too late!

I do know what I will continue to do....I will continue to find ways to communicate all the things  I need to say but find it hard to do and do so through art and photography.  This is what makes me smile and be happy. Truly.  Hopefully next time we talk, I will take my own advice and do all of this before another month washes away to sea.  It would be a shame if I let that happen again.