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Thursday, October 26, 2006

Second Chances

How many times do we get a second chance in life? How many times a third or 4th chance? This a pic of me and my other half last Christmas, my hair is longer and I have it worn curly (my natural state), he is wearing a hat that I hate because he always gets an attitude when he wears it. I'm superstitious in some ways. If something bad happens when you are wearing something, I'd rather you not wear it again. LOL Likewise, if something good happens, I will never forget what you are wearing and want to see you in the outfit again. So much has happened over this last year that I can hardly believe that I'm still sane. Well maybe I'm not and I just put on a good show.

I was thinking about what to write about today and since I didn't have time to take any pictures I figured I'd write about why I use the name Lucy on the blog. When I first met Ken, it was a chance meeting. We met at Applebees on a cold January about 3 years ago. That evening that I had been doing some shopping. My youngest son was with his father for the evening so after I finished shopping, I decided to get something to eat and stopped into Applebees (by myself). Being able to dine out alone is a small victory for me. The first time I did it, it was liberating. I conquered the fear of worrying what people think about someone who eats out by themselves (what, doesn't she have any friends?). I'm glad I did it that day because it changed my life. After I placed my order, 2 guys walked in and one I knew so we started chatting. It happened to be Ken's Uncle but as we were chatting my eyes kept drifting over to the man sitting beside my friend....as the nite wore on and the thought of getting a quick dinner quickly turned into a conversation that I didn't want to end....we all went to another place for a couple of drinks. We never stopped talking that nite and within a week, we were inseperable. It wasn't long before we were living together or rather he moved in with us. He worked late and every day when he came home, he'd yell, LUCY! I'm HOME!!! My named turned into Lucy thereafter. If I get called by my real name, I know I'm in trouble. We fell head over heels in love, but it's been a very rocky road. We were inseperable until a fateful nite 2 halloweens ago that changed our world. Or at least mine. Sparing all the details, it's suffice to say that I realized my other half had a big problem he needed help with....and we have been dealing with it ever since then. I mentioned at the beginning of the post, how many times do we get or give second chances, third chances....heck sometimes we give the ones we love 45 chances and then there are times when we just have to walk away. I chose not to walk away but that wasn't an easy choice either. We've had some time apart recently and I think that despite the circumstances, it's been a good thing. For him especially. I think now, and FINALLY now he realizes the value of getting another opportunity in life and what and how everyone's life is affected with the choices we make or have made. Through letter writing lately we have learned more from eachother than maybe we have in the 3 years we have been together. I think a certain honesty comes out in letter writing that may not come out when you are face to face. I can only hope that continues on. So in closing, I just wanted to reflect on giving second chances, learning to live with the choices we make, learning FROM the choices that we make, and about chance meetings that change your life. I try not to forget the turning points like that Halloween when my whole world turned upside down....or 19 years ago a different Halloween that changed my whole town when several teenagers got hit by a train....very good friends of my sister's and step brother.....they infact had just been dropped off by the driver of the car. It wasn't but a 1/2 mile from our house where the accident happened. Chance meetings, close calls, concidences....it seems to me that there are no coincidences. Things happen for a reason, it just may take a lifetime to figure out, and then other things are not meant for us to figure out.


lucy

4 comments :

Heidi said...

I was wondering why you have two names! Thanks for sharing what you're going through and have been through. When things are rough, I know my creative endeavors have been something that keeps me sane. I hope so for you too.

Becky said...

I love Lucy!
Your a true ispiration to me my older sister. Since that night In July I have sat in aww of how well you picked yourself up and rebuilt. Your stronger then you have ever been and I am so proud of you. I love and miss you
Becky

Lucy said...

becky--I love and miss you, too sis. You played a big part in my ability to startover, I can't thank you enough....you have the biggest heart of anyone I know. big hugs...your OLDer but not neccesarily wiser sister, lucy :)

Heidi-now you know about my duel identity..lol...I feel the same way as you do about my crafting/creative side, it's a great way to escape when all the rest of the world is going to you know where in a handbasket. Even when I'm not in that type of zone, it helps to clear my mind and mediate in a way :)

lucy

Paula said...

What a great post. Thanks for sharing something so personal. I think we can all relate to what you just said in our own ways, so many turning points in all of our lives. Sometimes its years later before we know if we actually turned the right way.
I had no idea that your name wasn't really Lucy! My daughter is a "Lucy" fan and sometimes says that when she calls. Too funny!!