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Friday, January 25, 2008

Painted Love

Today's post will not only be about creativity, it'll be about a bunch of my senseless ramblings. Because, that's how I've been feeling this week...pretty much all over the place so sit back and enjoy the read :)

Yes, Virginia, North Carolina does get snow! So for all of you Northerners who wish to escape the snow and bask in our balmy sun---guess again! Heh! At least once a year, the Sandhills seems to prey victim to the sneeze in a Northern bound snow storm. (I made that up not sure what sneeze really means in weather terms). We woke up to this last Thursday--and yep--it was all gone by noon. Not good if your a child and wanted to build a snow man. Would you believe they postponed school the DAY BEFORE the snow was scheduled to hit?? Yep. That's how we roll here! THEN--we get a call at 6:30 am from the school VRU to say, well, it's really not that bad so come on in at regular time. Geesh. Make up your mind. That musta sucked for the kids that had to be on the bus by 6:45 am! Good thing I didn't call the principal, you all could have been hearing me on You Tube this week!

So far as my creativity goes--this is my project for the week. I know, I know-you're supposed to be creative everyday--and I try to be--I've done lots of sketches and a few preps of backgrounds I'll be doing, but this is the only thing I've finished all week. You gotta start somewhere. This painted collage was created on wood--one of my favorite surfaces to paint on lately. Once you have a layer of gesso on, it's easy to manipulate the paint as if it were on canvas. Cheaper, too.

A few nights ago-I had the worse dream. What I remember of it isn't much, but I do recall a dead something or another chasing me--his head was cut off, so sometimes it was the head it chasing me and in other parts of the dream it was the headless bloody body. There was a flood in the dream, too. Scary stuff. I've definitely been drinking too much caffeine lately. I remember trying to save a bunch of people but with the flood coming and the army of dead people lead by this headless guy, it was really beyond saving anyone. What could this mean??

Speaking of haunting--what haunts someone with so much talent, and so much promise that somehow, for some reason, they end up dead from an overdose of sleeping pills (presumably)? I was really surprised and saddened by the death of Heath Ledger--which although he wasn't my favorite actor, he seemed to have so much going for him. What kept him awake every night that he had to turn to sleeping pills and anti-depressants to catch even a few minutes of the ever elusive sleep?? I guess all of us backseat drivers will never know and probably it's none of our business anyway--but it is almost surreal to think about. The moral of the story is that fame and fortune doesn't always bring you peace and happiness.

Speaking of fame and fortune--what about the trainwreck singer, Amy Whinehouse?? Meeshka. The crack smokin shot of her this week just made me shake my head---what is wrong with people??? The talent that is wasted on drugs is just shameful, not to mention the lives that are effected by the conductors of the train! Perhaps her hit song, Rehab was should have been the first hint that all was not well in Amy land? I'm not trying to make light of her 'crash and burn' moment lately, it's really sad to me--I guess because I can truly understand the craziness of it all having experienced being affected by someone controlled by drugs and alcohol, the understanding that there are good people underneath it all makes it all that much more hard to accept--even from a distance.

I think when it comes down to it, happiness doesn't come from things--perhaps it doesn't even come from accomplishments because if you can be nominated for 6 Grammy's and be chosen to be in one movie after another, yet you are still running from your life-- it's obvious it's not what you do or what you have that brings satisfaction and happiness. It's gotta come from within and it's gotta come from you. I'm sure there's millions of people who love Amy and Heath--and that wasn't even enough.
How tragic.

I got to thinking the other day, it's probably good that I'm not famous.
I'm pretty sure there's been a few times I've gone off the deep end or was irresponsible with my kids. I mean, not dangerously irresponsible, but I admit, I've taken them out without hats on in the dead of winter. I'm very sure I don't feed them enough vegetables. I've even gone out on the town--but I have not stripped naked in the middle of a store in the middle of the night while shopping with my posse. There was that time I forgot to zip up my pants at a bar after going to the bathroom one summer night. Only to be told by several Buffalo Bills players that, "Hey baby--I hate to be the one tellin' ya this, but ya zipper be down!"
Had I been famous, I would have definitely been on Entertainment Tonight or on You Tube and perhaps CBS This Morning that next week.
Phew. Thank goodness I'm not.

Nope. I'm just me. Boring really. I mean I get excited now at the prospect of going to Michael's to buy more craft paint. Instead of dreaming of meeting the perfect man at a bar like the old days (LOL...joke), I'm thinking if I DO meet someone new down the road, it will either be at Starbucks or the gas station, because those are the only places I really go besides the already mentioned Michael's. Yeah--chances not good from those
Because I can't afford a therapist to talk to help solve my woes and that which haunts me, I paint, create, and make a huge flippin mess of my house with my crappola. I'm not really sure how I would explain what I've done to my dining room table to a visiting guest (read male). I have a picture of it but that was edited from todays rambles. I can't even explain it to myself let alone anyone else!

Somehow things come together in the end, and it doesn't really need an explanation. I am who I am. Grammy's or not. It's okay really, because I am relatively happy. Could be richer. Could be skinnier. Could be in a positive relationship. Could make sure my kids wear hats in the cold. Could make sure all food groups are consumed in federally recommended ways. Could but I'm not. Could but I don't. It's okay. There's still time for me to change, as long as I don't become famous, don't let my hauntings overcome me, and I don't choose substance abuse over substance.

Okay--enough ramblin's--coming soon--lotsa good mail and hopefully a little more creative notions!


Leah said...

your hearts are beautiful!!

and don't beat yourself up! all the prep work you do is creative and i'm sure you were creative in a multitude of other ways this week. it doesn't' all have to be about finished pieces.

Jeanne Rhea said...

Your hearts are wonderful! Love this post. I have dreams like that sometimes, too and they are almost always triggered by some little thing that strikes me as a little/lot strange---but my dreams make them stranger! And my art work keeps me as sane as I am. No need for anything else.

So glad to see you used Cynthia's goodies and they are getting used already!

Paula said...

I really enjoyed this post, Jodi. It was fun rambling, not that boring am-I-ever-gonna-get-through-this rambling. I've had some weird-o dreams this week too. Gotta be the moon. I missed the story about Amy, but I agree how sad it all is. Everyone has their own demons and it's so sad when it catches up to them.
I love your hearts. Fantastic work!

wyndesnow said...

The hearts are beautiful. I'm not sure that you would be classified as boring but unique. You asked at my blog about the quilt runner. I used one charm pack with 36 squares and had to add one of my own. The pattern called for 37. I then used a solid red I had on hand for the center of the stars and the points on the stars are a white with red heart on it. You can find the pattern at Happy Zombie. and yes, the piggy was extremely fun to make.

Anonymous said...

What is with all these horrible dreams! I swear my dreams never end happily they always end in those kinda of things like yours. Might be the caffine too. I drink tons! I love to paint on wood to I think it is the best painting canvas ever!! I love amy winehouse songs but my gosh she really needs to get some help haha... I lvoe your hearts they are so pretty! thanks for coming by and visiting me!! Hope to see you back soon! Cant wait till the sweet goodness full of sunshine swap! Well have a great day and stay away from those zombies!

Jane said...

You just get better and better! Those little hearts are killing me!

Amy said...

beautiful hearts! I didn't really have time to read today, but I couldn't help but follow your ramble!

(Angie) Norththreads: said...

Thanks so much Lucy-these are gorgeous!!! Your art is amazing as always!!!!

Jenn Maruska said...

I really enjoyed your post. I liked reading your thoughts and seeing your pretty hearts coming together to show the final art piece.

You sure think alot!

: )

Rebecca said...

You DO think a lot LOL. :) I think your hearts are wonderful! I love them all grouped together like that. :)