Tuesday, November 02, 2010
Searching Art Everyday Month Day 2
Art Everyday Month Day 2 "Searching"
Journal page created in the new Strathmore Mixed Media art journal 9x12.
Materials Used: stabilo pencil, pitt pens, neocolor II crayons, and acrylic paint.
I created this page while watching TV last night, intervention and hoarders were on. If anyone has seen either of those shows--it truly is mind blowing on similar levels. People feeding their emotional issues with drugs, alcohol, junk, purses, clothes, trash, pets, and more, to the extent they all shut out the world to feed their addictions & escape reality, or cocoon in their homes surrounded by objects that have taken on the role of other humans. It's shameful and poisonous behavior for the families affected as much as it is for those with the issues.
So what do these shows have to do with the journal page? For me, it just got me thinking how in some ways I can see myself cocooning myself with my art, similar to a hoarder. I buy supplies, sometimes in irrational quantities because it makes me feel good to have and dream of what I can do with them all. Instead of talking to someone about how I feel, I'd rather put it in a journal or work out my issues with a painting. That's not to say creating is a bad thing because it truly is healing and uplifting--but to avoid contact with others in effort to shut the world out is not necessarily a healthy way of coping with life.
"Searching" what is that I'm searching for? What do I need to cope with? Well, I'm searching for my purpose. Am I on the right track or have I taken a detour? The stress of my past relationship over the last 7 years definitely has taken a toll on me and has caused me not to even really care if I meet someone anytime soon but yet at the sametime, I want to have that connection again (minus the issues and drama). I justify how much time I work on my art because I'm on a mission to make it my full time job one day, but spending all this time on it comes at a cost. It's worth it to me, but at the same time I want to make more time for more real world connections, not just connections on the canvas. Does that make sense? I do know though that having a creative outlet to cope with life's daily stresses is definitely healthier than turning to other evils in this world. I do think I'm on the right track I just may need to scale back a bit if I truly want to open the door to having someone share the ride with me. Until then, I really am 'Okay with the Journey'. We all question ourselves and our motives at times, and that's alright. It's called self discovery. It may even take a lifetime to find the answers and that's okay, too. That's called living. :)